Sat 9 Sep 17
At least when I'm in Singapore I'm all alone so I don't have to explain why I cry and I don't have to hide it.
xoxo S E
Cry and Cry and Cry
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Suicide
Wed 6 Sep 17
If I ever commit suicide one day, my last note is probably this:
"Goodbye. I sincerely hope your next wife will get to live a happier life than this."
xoxo S E
Hiding
Fri 7 Oct 16
To say that I'm unhappy with my life is a seriously grotesque understatement.
However I'm just glad that I have my best friend by my side, and that I can hide all of this negativity behind my son's happiness.
xoxo S E
Does love really conquer all?
Tue 15 Dec 15
Life is always simpler and happier when we were young. After all, the rule of love as per dictated by those children's bedtime stories books is fall in love, get married, and live happily ever after right?
I guess some people (the luckier ones) do live as per the rule.
But there are also the rest of us, who face some complications along the way.
Being 28, I regard myself as young still. I still believe in happily ever after. There's still this princess part of me that believes in all that bullshit.
I don't want to admit it, but I do feel it. As I get older, cynicism does kick in. I think there're just too many aspects of happiness for us to be able to fulfill them all.
But this I know for sure. When tears are just in the corner of your eyes ready to burst out you need to open your eyes wide so as to not let them fall, I guess happily ever after is still a long way to go. LOLs
xoxo S E
2015
Thu 10 Dec 15
12 December will come and go, just like any other day.
Yeah, I don't think I'll have a hard time convincing myself that. With my current situation, I don't expect that day to be any more than a normal weekend.
Perhaps probably a day specifically intended for praises of appreciation of me, and of course, for promises of a better future. Yeah, you heard me, promises.
This year is probably one of the worst year of my life, with the exception of my handsome baby boy Daverson Waterly of course (who's just turned six months on 8 Dec 15, by the way.) :D
Daverson Waterly, Tue 8 Dec 15 (6 months) - Bahari Hotel
Ok, worst year is probably overexaggerating it. But this year is by no means a good year. Not even remotely.
Growing more and more resentful of my current circumstances, who do I blame? It's human nature to find someone or something to blame for their less than ideal situation. I try frantically and desperately to find someone responsible for all this.
Maybe I should try to appreciate my life more. After all, there are those who have it worse than me, right?
On the plus side, this year is the year where I, with helps of families and friends, started a few small businesses I can call my own.
I never thought I had it in me at all to start a business, albeit insignificant in terms of revenues and profits. But trust me, I'm not in the slightest someone you would define as ambitious. No, not at all, I assure you all these are purely for survival. Though I'm starting to enjoy the fact that I can have some extra incomes besides my sometimes-part-time-sometimes-full-time job. Yup, that is a plus side. :)
xoxo S. E.
True Love
Mon 4 Apr 13
Someone once told me, "as adults, we are kidding ourselves if we said the thoughts will never stray... By allowing role play, it helps satisfy certain kind of desire without really acting on it...
And the best thing is it's still done between she and me... Best of both worlds..."
And the best thing is it's still done between she and me... Best of both worlds..."
(well.. its actually kinda a bit sex-related.. but.. u should know what i mean.."
actually.. now that i think about it..
i regret to say.. that i kind of disagree with the statements..
i regret to say.. that i kind of disagree with the statements..
dont know why.. but.. for me..
if u call it true love..
you dont have to distract urself with stuff and new ways so that ur love to ur partner wont stray..
if u call it true love..
you dont have to distract urself with stuff and new ways so that ur love to ur partner wont stray..
for me.. if u really feel the true love that u have with ur partner..
u dont ever need to do all of the above so that ur love to ur partner will "sort of" last..
u dont ever need to do all of the above so that ur love to ur partner will "sort of" last..
if u really feel and experience the "true love"..
u wont even have to or need to or even want to cheat.. or fantasize about other people.. or do harmless flirtings.. because the thought of being with ur partner is the happiest moment u could ever feel..
u wont even have to or need to or even want to cheat.. or fantasize about other people.. or do harmless flirtings.. because the thought of being with ur partner is the happiest moment u could ever feel..
this quote (see the following quote) is really common and popular in this world.. people use it as love quotes all the time.. it sounds a little bit like this (im sure uve heard or read it somewhere before):
"if u're with someone u truly love.. u dont ever want to go to sleep because reality is so much better than dreams.."
"if u're with someone u truly love.. u dont ever want to go to sleep because reality is so much better than dreams.."
i wont say that because i feel this way.. that makes me the holiest love-aholic.. i know ive done things wrong towards my husband before.. and i wont say that i dont do it anymore or that i wont do it again..
but.. sometimes.. i kinda agree with the quote..
for me.. when im with my husband.. that is really the happiest moments in my life.. i dont think any dreams about anythin will make me feel happier..
when my husband looks at me with so much love in his eyes.. the eyes that says that im the one and only and that im everythin he ever wanted..
when he smiles at me and kisses me..
when he strokes my hair and does all this impressions of me that he "claims" are always what i do in certain situations..
i feel really happy and content..
our signature wedding song was "When God Made You (by New Song)..
i really feels that this song is about me..
i'm a very spoiled girl.. i always wanna get what i want.. i always feel im right all the time.. and im extremely selfish..
but my husband.. he always knows how to make me happy..
(granted.. sometimes he pisses me off with all the things i wish he'd do but he didnt..)
but.. generally speaking..
when i feel sad and down.. he always in the end finds a way to make me smile or laugh..
when im being selfish.. he'd know the right moments to let me win.. and the right moment to scold (ok.. its really more of a "say" than a "scold"..) me so that i'd stop being like that (for my own good)..
when i feel sad and down.. he always in the end finds a way to make me smile or laugh..
when im being selfish.. he'd know the right moments to let me win.. and the right moment to scold (ok.. its really more of a "say" than a "scold"..) me so that i'd stop being like that (for my own good)..
he might not be everythin i always wanted (well actually.. he's so so so close..)
but he really is everything i ever needed..
and i really thank God that i met him..
well.. i'm probably naive.. and i dont wanna be hypocritical here and say i feel the "True Love"..
i still have got so much to learn..
learn to love him as he is.. (even tho there really are some habits / ways of thinking of his that irks me!! grr!! haha)
i still have got so much to learn..
learn to love him as he is.. (even tho there really are some habits / ways of thinking of his that irks me!! grr!! haha)
and also.. this is probably a bit due to some movie-induced kind of influence..
but i really think that.. if u feel and experience the true love..
the feelings will never go stray..
but i really think that.. if u feel and experience the true love..
the feelings will never go stray..
even yet.. u cant even imagine urself not feeling in love with ur partner for even 1 second..
but yaahh.. tats probably naive.. hahaha
xoxo S. E.
April 2012 Snapshots
Sat 19 May 12
hehehe...
#SoManyImportantThingsToDoButIJustWannaProcrastinateByPosting
SomeUnimportantPosts
anyway..
i just wanna post some of my Apr 2012 snapshots that i think are memorable.. hehehe...
this picture was taken on Fri 20 Apr 12..
at Singapore Shopping Centre.. (the place where i work at the moment)..
this picture is actually of me and my good friend rin..
but.. i really like my face at this angle.. so.. i cropped her out..
(sorry rin >,<) hihihi...
as we speak, this picture is currently my facebook and twitter profile picture..
hehehe...
and also one of my good friends..
i edited the picture myself..
so all the wordings in the picture.. it's all me.. hahaha...
describing "Days of our 'Office' Lives) hihihi...
and i love it!!
1. my wallpaper is the picture inside the polaroid photo at the middle of the table..
2. the cup of coffee on the upper right side of the table represents the battery life.. so when battery is full, the cup of coffee will be full.. vice versa, when the battery is empty.. the cup of coffee will be empty as well..
this is.. so far.. (not exaggerating) the best blackberry theme i have ever downloaded.. free or purchased..
and because of this theme.. now i think i like my BlackBerry 9780 more than my BlackBerry 9900.. hahaha
NOT-MADE-FOR-HOUSEWORK proof no. 2!!
the first time (i think it was a couple of months back) it was one of my finger nails chipped off..
this is no. 2!!!!!
see the picture?! those are the results of sweeping the patio at my home Tanamera Crest! (Sat 28 Apr 12)
and one more thing.. when i shower or wash hand.. they sting like F*CK!!!!!!!!!!
the first time (i think it was a couple of months back) it was one of my finger nails chipped off..
this is no. 2!!!!!
see the picture?! those are the results of sweeping the patio at my home Tanamera Crest! (Sat 28 Apr 12)
and one more thing.. when i shower or wash hand.. they sting like F*CK!!!!!!!!!!
and this one.. is a picture of me.. 7 pictures collaged into 1 picture..
this picture was taken and edited on Sun 29 Apr 12..
ok.. i think this is it for now.. ciao!! hahaha
xoxo S. E.
Manicure & Pedicure Sat 12 May 12
Sat 19 May 12
hmm..
it's been rather a while since i last had my nails done..
since january 2012, i believe..
anyway.. i just had my nails done last week..
and i just wanna post some pictures.. hehehe...
hehehe...
i really really like my pedicure nail art design..
but..
for the manicure nail art design.. i don't really like it.. sigh..
xoxo S. E.
My Tongue Piercing Has Healed!
Wed 25 Apr 12
XD
Yesterday (Tue 24 Apr 12) was officially the fourth week of my tongue piercing..
And now I've healed!!
yay!!
LOL
The first week was the worst..
I can't even begin to explain it..
Difficulty in talking, eating, and brushing teeth.. Not to mention the most painful pain ever when I just woke up.. (Ok, the most painful pain ever part is probably me exaggerating it, but it was very painful, ok?!)
Seriously, for the first week, I ate nothing but porridge, yogurt, mashed potato, and some other soft foods (and still experience pain while eating it)..
Then the talking, talking was rather difficult, but at least I still could get people to understand what I was talking..
Especially because the tongue barbell was so long inside my mouth (2 cms), it was rather difficult to keep it in place so that I wouldn't accidentally irritate it.
One week after that (3 Apr 12), I changed to a much shorter tongue barbell (1.6 cms)..
I felt much much much better after that.. Talking and eating and brushing teeth were easier (though I still had some difficulties)..
Two weeks after that (17 Apr 12), I couldn't take it anymore.. Even though some people stayed with 1.6 cms barbell because it's comfortable enough (length-wise) and it leaves some length so that people can play with the piercing..
No.. I was way too scared to play violently with it.. I don't mind not playing with my tongue piercing, the fact that the piercing is there is good enough for me..
So, I went and changed to a shorter barbell (1.4 cms).. And life has been wonderful ever since..
Yesterday, I celebrated my tongue piercing four week anniversary by eating fried chicken at popeyes with my very very good and wonderful friend Zann, who accompanied me to pierce my tongue at the first place..
So happy!!
I;ve always wanted to pierce my tongue.. But so far, my fear had always overcome my desire.. But now.. I've done it!!
Sometimes I can't help but play with it a little bit, but not violently of course.. I'm way too timid to play with it violently..
Anyway, i'm happy.. hehehehehehehe
xoxo S. E.
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